Using a Random Deepak Chopra Wisdom Generator to Predict the Last Two Dallas Cowboys Regular Season Games, 2013

If the Dallas Cowboys win their final two games, against NFC East rivals Philadelphia and Washington, they will win the division with a 9 -7 record.* They are currently 4 – 0 in the division, owning the first tiebreaker.

For all the ways they have found to lose in the 2013 season, for the ways they would most likely find to lose a Wild Card round playoff game, their 2013 campaign lurches up against these Stalingrads: a self-consuming, ectoplasm-owned, racist-denominated Washington team, and a rebounding (on average) Philly, lead by a QB-who-is-not-Vick and the Offense of the Future (Wait Until Next Year When You See It In Austin).

I used the first two quotes gurgitated by the Deepak Chopra Wisdom Generator as a more “quantumly-enabled” I Ching to predict the outcomes of these “win or go home” games—a category in which Tony Romo is statistically proven to be cursed.

Week 16, Sunday, Dec 22^nd-- Dallas at Washington: "The unexplainable is the path to the doorway to silence"

This is clearly about Shanahan. OK, I choose to make it about him, and by making the choice, I have most likely created a new universe in which it is true.

Dallas 27, Washington 17

Dallas: 8 - 7, 5- 0 NFC East

Week 17, Sunday, Dec. 29^th-- Philadelphia at Dallas: "The universe embraces subjective mortality" 

Woah, Deepak Chopra Wisdom Generator, just whoa. This is heavy, heavy stuff. Probably. I believe what you’re saying here is that Jerry Jones is going to come face-to-face with…nah, not going to happen. However, I do sense the thrust of your argument here.

Dallas 24 Philadelphia 21

Dallas wins the NFC East, 9 -7 overall, perfect 6 - 0 in the division.

How will they fare in the first playoff round? That's up to you, my friends. Cast your intention into the Universe.

*As I predicted before the season started

“Chopra Wisdom Generator”: http://www.wisdomofchopra.com/